Giving

If you want something, give it away! Does that sound crazy? You get more of what you want, by giving away some of what you have. When a farmer wants more seeds, he takes his seeds and gives them to the earth. When you want a smile, you give yours. When you want affection, you give affection. When you help people, they help you. When you want a smack in the mouth, you smack someone?!=) And if you want people to give you money, share some of yours.

Think about it. If attachment hinders the flow of good things into you life, then the opposite of that would be unattachment – to the point where we give away some of what we value. What you give away will tend to come back to you.

The balance in your bank book is not the measure of your abundance. Abundance is what’s circulating through your life. Prosperity is a flow – giving and receiving. If you have a fortune in Swiss deposits, and you’re not using it, then it’s not enriching you. Technically, it’s yours, but in reality you’re receiving nothing from it. It’s not making you abundant and it might as well belong to someone else. So the principle of give and receive holds, even here.

The trick to giving is to give without wanting anything back. If you expect something back, you are attached to a result – and when you are attached, less happens.

And you should enjoy your material possessions? Of course! Just make sure you own them and they don’t own you.

Passion

When you are about what you do, enthusiasm carries you through. When you are passionate, no one else has to motivate you.

If you open your dream restaurant, and no one comes to eat, you keep trying new recipes, ideas and locations until the place is crammed. If you run out of money first, you take your enthusiasm to someone who has more money than you – and you get a partner. You go through frustrations – and a few chefs – but in your heart, you know you’re on course. Sure you need plenty of determination, but your passion is your foundation.

Vitality comes from a sense of purpose. You owe it to yourself and you owe it to other people to do what excites you. There are already enough lukewarm people to do what excites you. They are already enough lukewarm people in the world who get burned out without having been on fire.

Following your dream is no guarantee of an easy ride. Life usually becomes more challenging, but you embark on an outer journey which starts the inner journey. You have a chance to blossom – to see who you really are.

Wherever you are, you aren’t stuck – you are a human being, not a tree!

Courage

“Courage starts as a servant and becomes a master”

-Kahlil Gabran-

People write songs about singing in the rain, but in real life, when they get wet, they moan. People love to watch Indiana Jones wading knee-deep through snakes and spiders – but when their office air-conditioning fails, they explode. Perhaps if we had fewer adventures on our video recorders, we would look for more adventures in life.

“Being comfortable” is overrated. I’m not talking about “money” comfortable. I’m talking “situation” comfortable. Much of our stress is created by our addiction to comfort… “planes should always be punctual, the workload should always be easy, the bank overdraft should be comfortable.”

Too much comfort gets boring. Our brains seize up! The less rules you make for how life ought to be and how you ought to feel, the easier it is for you to respond to whatever happens.

If you follow any kind of dream you’ll sometimes be comfortable – you’ll get rejected, criticized, short of cash and exhausted. When adversity comes your way, see it as part of the process. Be fascinated. Be interested. Be amused. See the fun in being behind the eight ball.

Something else about comfort. You’ll notice that, very often, courage is being rewarded that IQ – and this frustrates some people. As a rule, rewards come when we risk our reputation or our money – or both.

Courage is not the absence of fear – courage is acting in spite of fear. People who do nothing with their lives are just as scared as people who take major risks. It’s just that the first group get scared over tiny things. Why not get scared over something significant?

Do I have to love myself?

Yes! People who don’t like themselves are a pain in the neck!

Many people are uncomfortable with the idea of “loving themselves.” At the same time, they expect their partners to love them! Isn’t that a little odd? To have a healthy relationship, we have to like/love ourselves.

We can’t give anyone else something that we don’t have. We can never accept other people as they are until we accept ourselves as we are. When we are mesmerized by our own faults, we look for the same faults in other people in the hope it will make us feel better. And we find them, but we don’t feel better.

While we concentrate on our own faults, the world will keep punishing us, and we will keep punishing ourselves. We do it with ill health, with poverty, with loneliness. As long as we don’t like ourselves, the world won’t like us. And then we blame the world.

Being Spiritual

Whatever your belief system is, the idea that we live only for ourselves is one of the greatest myths in the pursuit of happiness. When we live only for ourselves and satisfy only our wants and needs, we become self-centered and materialistic. We forget that our lives are interconnected with other lives, and that, in order to be truly happy, we must give of ourselves. When we realize that the things that will give us the greatest joy are those that are intangible, we begin to realize that there is another dimension, one that gives us this feeling. This is our spirit, or as others would say, our soul.

And when we understand that there are forces that control our world, our universe and that they give harmony and order to our world, we can see that this couldn’t have come by chance. Just as a house doesn’t come into existence on its own, then the natural, universal laws that regulate our existence must cone from some Higher Source of power. When we attune our souls to this power source, our lives become more meaningful, more profound and thus have more purpose.

This is what spirituality is all about. It’s connecting our soul to another. Soul from which emanates all the positive feelings we desire in life. Think of it as a cell phone that needs to be recharged through a main power source. In order for our lives to function really well, we need to be charged and recharged by the sparks of divinity.

Do you remember?

Why is it what that when somebody does something good, we hardly remember, and yet when somebody makes a mistake, we don’t forget? It’s natural for a person to make mistakes; it’s by making occasional errors that we learn to appreciate and do what’s right. But how come many people only tend to see the negative instead of the positive?

Much of this has to do with our experiences in life. When someone highly regarded gives us an advice and it turns out that he doesn’t take his own advice, our image of him or her gets shattered. We think, “He isn’t so good after all.” Sometimes, too, we compare ourselves with others and conjure a list of his defects so that we’d come out better. But whatever the reason, it simply isn’t a good habit to think negatively of others – even those who may have offended us.

We might harbor hurt, but the challenge is to let it go away naturally. Why should we avoid negative thoughts? Simply because our thoughts are the basis of our actions, which become our lifelong habits. If we think negative thoughts, we develop negative minds. The key is to remember the good and let go of the bad.

Happiness =)

Happy people don’t care about what others do or have. They don’t judge themselves by anyone’s yardstick. They stay focused on their own goals and objectives, not worrying a great deal what anyone else thinks. They avoid comparisons with others recognizing that there will always be people who have more or are better.

Be grateful for who you are and what you have…

This isn’t to say that we should be content with our lot in life and make no initiative to improve, but rather, enjoy and appreciate the good things that come our way and make the most out of it. There are a lot of things in life that you may not have, but there are a lot more things in life that you truly have – and which you just don’t notice!

If you really think about it, we are al blessed with a lot of good things both within and around us. Just consider the following simple facts, which many of us tend to overlook:

If you wake up on Monday morning feeling strong, healthy and alert…then you are luckier than approximately one million others who will not be alive by the end of the week.

If you sit down for breakfast with your parents or other family members…you are one of the shrinking few who eats regularly with their families.

If you have food on the table and clothes to wear to work or school…you are part of only 25% in this world who can afford such things.

If you can read the newspaper on the way out…you are far better off than over two billion people in the world who are classified as illiterate.

If you have money to withdraw from an ATM or change with which to buy some snacks or other luxuries…you belong to the selected 10% of the humanity who have enough money for their daily needs.

If you can bring out your cellphone and text your friends or family while at work…you are one of the lucky few who can afford electronic gadgets; it’s estimated that up to 70% of the world’s population still has no access to the latest telecommunication facilities.

If you are able to hold your loves ones’ hands, hug them or even touch them on the shoulder when you got home…you are lucky because so many people don’t have home of their own.

And on weekends, if you got o a house of worship freely…you are more blessed than three billion people in the world who cannot.

These are just some of the many things that we are privileged and blessed to experience. Appreciating them is all a matter of attitude; it depends on how you see things. Is the glass of water before you half-empty…or half-full? Is the stone right before you a stumbling block…or a stepping stone? Is your life filled with trials and adversities…or is it teeming with challenges than can help you become a better person later on? Happiness is not just a feeling, it’s a condition, a choice, and an attitude that you create.

Dialogues of Coffeeholic

Coffeeholic opens up a conversation with the Heavenly Father.

Master, we all make mistakes. Please forgive me for my wrongdoings, help me forgive others for theirs, and help them forgive me as well. Teach me how to make wise choices and decisions so that I may live my life in a way that is pleasing to you.

If my attitude smells to high heaven, help me to trash my complaints and bitterness. Replace this garbage with your love so my attitude will be a delight to both you and to those around me.

Thank you for stitching friends into the fabric of my life. Their colorful patterns and personalities add a richness and texture to who I am. May we provide loving comfort to one another as we walk along life’s path.

Much thanks for giving me my good friends Mam Nads, Marg, Ria, Jaja, Jaq, Jem, Michelle, Lord Jane, Charles, Randy, Kuya Felix, Kuya Jong, Kuya Eric, Jason, Dominic, Richard, Ronald, Rogelio, Jeff, Mar, Perry and others. They are like a secret garden growing in my heart. May the seeds of our friendships blossom into great bouquets of happiness and carry the scent of our joy to others.

Help me not to disconnect from these special people you have placed in my life. I may make new friends but old good friends can never be replaced. Help me to cherish the friends you have given me.

I ask for your protection and care over my family, friends and myself. Send your guardian angels to protect us and lead us away from danger. Help me recognize your intervention in my life so I will never take you for granted.

Help me to create special memories with my family - Daddy, Mommy, Ate Karen, Kuya Marlon, Kuya Conrad, Rita, Carlo, Avic, Baby Ella, and Baby Simon. When we look back at those times, help us to remember the laughter not the tears. Help us envision the smiles, not the frowns and help us to remember our love.

Help me to see the humor in life. Thank you for giggles and smiles. Help me to use them effectively as I sprinkle them through my day. May I see the joy in all my circumstances.

Lord, I give you my wardrobe. Clothe me in the beauty of humility, for that will never go out of style. Help me to dress in the glory of your gentleness, topped with the attitude of graciousness. May these garments impress all I meet so they will know I am well dressed because I am the daughter of the King.

Help me to accessorize every outfit with a smile. Give me contentment even when there are holes in my socks and my stretch pants have no other choice. Even when, I know I will be dressed for success, for my attitude will outshine any fashion statement my neighbor can afford.

Please guide my ship through the storms of life and lead me to safe harbors. Thank you for the gales that make me stronger and the gentle breezes which bring me hope for tomorrow.

Help me to remember that no advantage, small or large, is worth losing my integrity. Give me a nudge when I am tempted to compromise and let a little dishonesty sneak in. For keeping my heart clean is wise, and it will bear the fruit of goodness in my life.

Thank you for the people you have put into my life. Their love changes my world, and my heart overflows with love for them. May I make difference in their lives as well.

Thank you for everything I have received and for all that I have escaped.

Thank you for all the imperfections, changes and unexpected events that come into my life.

Thank you for my life. You created me into my mother’s womb, it was your idea! Help me to use this gift of life you have given me in such a way that I will be a blessing. Give me your grace to bloom where you have planted me, despite whatever circumstances I face. Help me to be open so that I may live life to its fullest.

Give me the courage to do the hard and needful thing. Keep my motivations pure and grounded in Your love. Thank you for being there when I stumble and help me to reach out to others who have fallen.

No matter how my circumstances may change, you are with me. When my life shifts from one season to the next, I can still call on you and you will answer me.

Goodbye for now, Master.

Coffeeholic is happy for her wonderful têtê-a-têtê with the King.=)

Take a bow

Bowing is the Oriental counterpart of the Western handshake. Although, it is common in many Asian countries, nowhere is this more prevalent than in Japan, where is it regarded as a very important social gesture. By lowering the head, or sometimes the entire upper body, Japanese show their respect for the person they are bowing to.

Different forms of bows are used for conveying apologies, showing gratitude, expressing different emotions – humility, sincerity, remorse or deference. They are also used in traditional arts and religious ceremonies. Generally, the longer and deeper the bow, the stronger the emotion. A person of lower rank commonly bows longer, more deeply and more frequently than a person of higher rank.

One of the most impressive bows I have ever seen was that accorded to a high-ranking Japanese diplomat. As the diplomat was about to leave a function, the hosts (who were also Japanese) presented impressive gifts. They then took turns bowing several times to the dignitary, who also bowed in response. It was a simple act for them, it was a profound learning experience for me, telling me that respect should be a major part of our lives.

What is a Good Film? Let me count the ways…

It is really important that a film is well made. A good film is not only a film that is technically okay. No! A good film is more than the technical aspects. Not because a film happens to have more eye-blasting scenes or visual effects, can it already qualify as a good film. We cannot also call good camera movements, good sound effects, good actors and actresses as a good film. For me, a good film is a combination of many factors. And that starts with a good story.

How do we arrive at a good story?

A good story starts in the mind of the scriptwriter. Although a film is basically a director’s medium, it could not stand a chance in FAMAS or in OSCAR’s unless the film emanates from a good script. And a good script comes from a writer who knows what he/she wants.

A film is good fit if it conveys a message. As usual, there are rotten messages. One starts showing his/her private parts or starts beating a helpless guy. Those may convey a message. Those scenes say something. But a film is good is the writer gathers together scenes to contrast the main themes of the film and arrive at a solution. It is not just an orgy of scenes, but every scene advances the theme that the writer wants to communicate. Nudity maybe okay if it advances a message; massacre scenes are okay if they advance the message of the story. But if these scenes no longer serve the purpose but instead just titillate the watcher, then they do not make a film good.

A film is good if it narrates a story. And it can only happen if the script narrates the story. There are times when we watch a movie and in the middle of the movie, we begin asking why the hero comes to know the whole thing or how on earth the bad guys discover the whole plan of the bida. At that instance, the film, and for that matter, maybe the script as well, fails to narrate the story. A good film shows in a gradual way and through visual presentations the development of the story.

A film is good if the scenes are beautiful and well-crafted. And when I say beautiful and well-crafted, it does not mean showing panoramic scenes with the best sceneries in the country. It must a create a good feeling in the audience – that is, the audience’s mind and heart contemplate the whole presentation, and they came out from the theater feeling good and contemplating.

Anyway, there are other things to look for in a good movie. I guess if moviegoers were educated and knew what a good movie is, there would really be no need for any board tasked to review and monitor movies/television shows. But I guess, that is a long, long way to go=)

Late Again!

Try these basic and advance methods to overcome tardiness.

The Basic

• Use nature. First, choose bedroom which faces east. Then, position your bed in a way that your eyes will catch the morning rays of the sun. Be sure you don't get wet when the rain comes.
• Mama's reminder. Come rain or shine, tropical depression or lahar, your mother has the patience or persistence to wake you up.
• Buy an alarm clock. Set your clock at the desired hour you wish to get up. Do not cover or throw a pillow when it rings!

The Advance

• Prepare your needed things for the next day and remind yourself again and again you wish to wake up early. If you still get late....!Gosh! You must be a terrible person (joke!) that is, Terrible Turtle Traffic (TTT).